Retirement: A Full-Time Job

Retire So You Can Smile With Reckless Abandon

Whether you like Hillary Clinton or not, you have to admit, her candidacy has sure opened a lot of old wounds for women of this country.  This article in today's New York Times reminds me that we are not quite "there" yet.

The "Iron my shirts" heckling, the "Stop running for president and go make me a sandwich" website, and the "How do we beat the bitch?" question at a McCain campaign event, illustrate that women are still caught between a rock and a hard place.

"Mrs. Clinton's campaign, many women say with regret, did not inspire a deep or nuanced conversation between men and women, only familiar gender-war battles consisting of male gibes and her supporters' angry responses."

In addition to the valid debates between the candidates, we went one step further with Hillary:

"the fixation on her clothes, even her cleavage; chronic criticism that her voice is shrill; calls for her to exit the race; and most of all, the male commentators in the news media who, they argue, were consistently tougher on her than Mr. Obama."

(There was a very funny Saturday Night Live skit about this last point where they asked Obama during a mock televised debate "are you comfortable, can we get you a pillow?")

The article, peppered with examples of sexism in in the workplace, reminded me of one of my own experiences early in my career.  The head of the tax department at my "Big 8" accounting firm took me out for a mentoring lunch.  This should have been a big windfall for me, receiving the guidance of the head of the tax division.

His advice?  "Maybe if you didn't smile so much, that might help."

Related Posts:

Feminism is a Bad Word Again

Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader?

The Church of America

The Church of America

I don't know if this just sounded so brilliant because I drank one Manhattan and two glasses of Sangria, but my dad made an observation over dinner on Friday night that I thought was spot on.

We were discussing the latest hoopla over Obama's ex-preacher.  The talking heads were calling for Obama to more strongly denounce his church's ex-leader for his most recent comments as well as for decades of other comments.

What my dad wanted to know was why isn't John McCain being called out to denounce his leader, the current leader of this nation?  John McCain honorably served his country in combat and was even subject to torture in a POW camp.  At the same time, our current president was doing his best to avoid active military duty and currently does his best to allow torture while denying that he condones it.

Shouldn't the talking heads be angrily calling for McCain to vehemently denounce his "preacher" and protest by leaving his "church" (the senate) in an angry huff?  I would argue that who's someone's preacher is far less important than whom one currently supports as leader, when they themselves claim to operate by different ideals.

Isn't McCain sitting silently in the pews of congress by allowing our current administration to torture POW's (excuse me, "enemy combatants")?  Shouldn't he be called upon to stand up and denounce the leader that is not leading the way he says he himself would lead?

Why do we care more about a political candidate's religious leader than their political leaders?  If it is supposed to say something about the candidate's character, or the way he will lead, isn't there much more of a correlation between a man and his political leader?

If this isn't sounding as brilliant as it seemed to me on Friday night, go drink a couple shots and read it again.

Related Posts:

My Dirty Little Secret

Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader

Feminism is a Bad Word Again

Are You Smarter than a Fifth-Grader?

If you didn't catch The O'Reilly Factor last night, I'll fill you in.  Last night, Bill O'Reilly was very pained by some comments Elton John made at a Hillary Clinton fund raiser.  Apparently, Elton John accused America of being misogynistic.  Well, not exactly America, but some of America anyway.  His exact words were that he was "amazed by the misogynistic attitudes of some of the people in this country."  Bill was deeply offended on behalf of America.  I think he is worried that America has hurt feelings now, being called misogynistic by Elton John and all.

Well Bill, I'm here to tell you not to worry too much, most of America is not offended.  It is a well known fact (and by well-known, I mean I'm making it up here) that three-quarters of Americans do not even know what misogynistic means, so they are not offended.  (Well, it could be a true fact, I mean, I had to look up the word myself a few months ago and I know for sure I'm smarter than three-quarters of Americans.  No, I am not smarter than a 5th-grader, but they are a very small percentage of the top quartile.)

Bill brought on an expert guest.  By expert, I mean a woman.  Radio talk show host, Laura Ingraham weighed in on what she thought about Elton John "calling America . . . a woman-hating society."  Here's the meat of that part of the interview:

O'REILLY: Well, but you're a woman who's competing in a very difficult industry, a very competitive industry.

INGRAHAM: Sure.

O'REILLY: Do you think we're a misogynistic society here?

INGRAHAM: No, I don't, Bill. I think, you know, men and women are different. We have different challenges and...

O'REILLY: But you haven't been held back because of your gender? Because talk radio is dominated by idiots like me, white guys.

INGRAHAM: No, I...

(There you have it, the official "No, I . . ." from the expert woman.  Now onto the insightful follow-up question:)

O'REILLY: Now here's the most important question I have. Do you know where I can get a little cape like Elton John had? Can you show that little cape he had? Because what I want to do is I want to put "No Spin" on the back of the cape. Do you know where I can get one of those?

(And because she is an expert, yes, she knew where to get that cape--he let her talk a lot more about the cape than the whole woman-hating thing.)

I'd like to take a moment to address those Americans that may have been offended by my Feminist post a few days ago, kind of saying the same thing that Elton John said minus the big word.  This New York Times Article uses language that is just a tad bit more diplomatic than I used.

"The challenge for women competing in politics or business is less misogyny than unconscious sexism".

I should have said that men are unconscious, not that men are stupid.  My mistake.

My Dirty Little Secret

All right, I am going to confess.  I have a secret vice.  One so heinous my friends and family are shocked and appalled.  Others just ask "why, oh why do you do that?!?"  I have justifications, things I tell myself to make myself feel better about what I'm doing.  But I don't think they understand.

I watch the Fox News Network.  There, I said it.

Yes, I'm talking Hannity and Colmes and The O'Reilly Factor.  And when I can't get enough, I can sometimes switch over and get some more from Joe Scarborough.  If I'm really lucky, while I'm channel surfing among the other not-so-fair-and-balanced channels, I happen upon an Ann Coulter interview on Chris Matthews or Donny Deutsch.  Those are some good times . . .

Why do I do it?  I like to think it's something noble; my newspaper-man uncle tells me we should watch to hear what the "other" side is saying.  It almost makes it sound like I am respecting other people's opinions when said like that!  But the truth is, no, I don't respect other people's opinions, especially not Sean Hannity's.

I do it because I like to yell at the TV.  I like to tell them what idiots they are; I like to tell them why they are SO wrong.  I can't do that in real life.  When I'm on a rampage that people agree with, ok, they love my passion, but not if we disagree.  My husband has told me it's my "tone."  People only like my tone when it is saying something they agree with, and then they adopt the tone too.

But the Fox News Network can take it!  I can dish it out and they can take it!  It's almost as if they are not even listening.  They go ON AND ON, no matter what I yell at them.  In fact, they can drag out a "story" long after everyone else has put it to rest.  You want to see some more stuff on the Reverend Wright "scandal"?  Well tune in to Fox tonight, I'm sure they will work it in somewhere.  And lest you forgot about the hugely controversial comments made by Sen. Obama where he actually equated pregnancy and STD's!  (By basically saying they were two conditions teenage girls don't want to have.)  They will talk about that again tonight I'm sure.  And not to single out Barack, but Hillary's "sniper fire" is still the top issue in her campaign on the Fox News Network.  And this is all so great because I keep thinking of more and more retorts when the stories are so old.  If they came up with anything new, I would have to get some new material to yell at the TV!

But don't worry, after I feel my blood pressure rising to dangerous heights, I simply turn to the other Fox and catch an episode of Friends until my heart rate returns to normal.

Feminism is a Bad Word Again

All right.  I'm just going to say it, there IS gender discrimination in the workplace.  Most men I know like to think they are just so much more enlightened than men of earlier generations; they would NEVER discriminate based on the fact that someone is a woman.  Baloney!  Men are just too stupid to realize they are doing it!  When they welcome a man into the "club" over a woman, it's not because she's a woman, no, it's simply because the man is "more qualified" to be in that club.  Right.

I'll tell you why men don't realize they are discriminating.  Because it's so subtle, even they  don't recognize they are doing it.  Men are more comfortable with men in the workplace.  It's just that simple.  It's great to have a few women around to liven up the place a bit (and to handle the nitty-gritty work), but not for being part of the club, the management team.

This article in the Wall Street Journal yesterday really got my blood boiling.  And no, I didn't support Hillary in the primaries (actually came very close, though, just changing my vote the night before voting day).  It's perfectly ok not to support Hillary, and it doesn't mean you are a sexist pig.  There are plenty of reasons not to vote for her other than the fact that she's a woman (her vote helping to involve us in the Iraq war for one).  But it's the WAY that men don't support her that offends me.  Witness these examples in the WSJ article:

-First, by the telling of one woman's experience driving with a Hillary bumper sticker on her car.  "A man pulled up alongside and rolled down his window.  'You can be for Hillary all you want', he shouted, 'but there is no way that thing is going to become president'."  Wow.

-Or the other woman who, at lunch with "a group of male chief executives 'started talking about what an awful b---- Hillary was and how they'd never vote for her.'  She says she kept quiet.  'I didn't want to jeopardize my relationship with them,' she says.  'But their remarks were a clear reminder that although I could sit there eating and drinking with them, and work with them, instinctively their reaction to me isn't positive'."

-And apparently, among the 50 anti-Hillary sites on Facebook, one of them, called "Hillary Clinton Stop Running for President and Make me a Sandwich,"  has more than 38,000 members.  "What if one of these 38,000 guys is someone you, as a woman, have to go to and negotiate a raise?"  Yeah, you've really evolved.

-Another woman who recently helped a male colleague with a work-related issue began discussing politics with him.  "When talk turned to politics, she says, he denounced Sen. Clinton as a "lesbian" and used several slurs."  While she didn't make her feelings known, "she thought to herself, 'That's the last time I do you a favor'."

-I do agree with this woman's thoughts:  "No one can say that the male vote is all gender based . . .But it reinforces among women of my generation the feeling that every day we walk in the door (at work), we are walking into an environment that is still biased."

The article's concluding thoughts pointed out that many women don't feel comfortable being called "feminists."  There is a feeling by many women that identifying yourself as a feminist puts you in the "militant" camp, and makes you equally subject to the same venom Hillary has subjected herself to.

Better to play nice and just say that you agree, there's no workplace discrimination and everything is just hunky-dory with you.  No militant bitch sitting at this desk, thank you very much.