Maybe Don't Try So Hard

When my husband and I watch a complicated movie or TV show, sometimes even an uncomplicated one, Doug will hit the pause button to ask me what’s going on.  I tell him we’re not supposed to know yet, don’t worry about it.  I tell him don’t try so hard to analyze it.  Just let it wash over you and you’ll get it in the end.

I’m reading The Big Short right now.  It’s a great read and I’m learning a lot.   But I often have a hard time keeping the players straight, remembering who’s selling what to whom, and what the difference between a synthetic CDO and a credit default swap is.  I’m trying to just let it wash over me.  I’m hoping I’ll get in the end.

I’m a jazz lover.  My in-laws have recently started to enjoy jazz.  At first they were a little put off by all the improvisation.  It was hard for them to pick out the melody, and that was frustrating to them.  But they took a couple of jazz appreciation classes and in the end, they enjoyed it more. 

Doug and I enjoyed a jazz set at one of my favorite New York jazz clubs a few nights ago. I know that to really enjoy jazz, you just have to relax into it and let it wash over you.  You shouldn’t try too hard to follow along.  Just enjoy the ride, that’s what it is in the end. 

And so it is with retirement.  If you try too hard to figure out what it’s all about, try too hard to analyze it, try too hard to construct it, you’re just going to get frustrated.  Instead, just relax into it.  Enjoy the ride.  Because that's what it is in the end.

Related Posts:

    Mozart, Retirement, and Having My Whole Life Out in Front of Me

    What Five Things Make You Most Happy (and Why Aren't You Doing Them?)

    Being Retired is Kind of Like Being Benjamin Button

Comments

[Stan M.]

Makes sense. We shouldn't always be able to anticipate movies/music, life.
With persons new to Jazz I wouldn't recommend they start with Modal or Free Jazz (Coltrane) it is challenging. Maybe go for West Coast(Miles Davis, Stan Getz) or skip ahead to Fusion (Weather Report,Return to Forever.
I can only take the hard improvisational stuff in small doses.

[John Q]

I agree that sometimes we try to over think retirement. Think of your 3 month summer vacation at age 15. Did you read a book to understand how to have fun during that three month period? Stay flexible and energetic and you will have fun in retirement.

[Retired Syd]

@John Q: You're right. But I do recall many instances during those summer breaks when I pestered my mom, "Mom, I'm bored, there's nothing to DOOOOO." I know a lot of retired people struggle with this from time to time too . . .

[Mike Crosby]

The Big Short. That's the best book I've read in years. It's one of those books that changes my life.

I run into this fellow often on the golf course. He told me he recently retired, but he's bored. On Monday, he starts a new job.

Different strokes for different folks. I think it takes courage to take on retirement. Sure, one is used to working the 8-5 with all it's attending stress. Give it a break, and learn how to ease into retirement.

[deegee]

Syd, big differences between now and when we were 15 are (1) we could not drive, (2) there was no internet, and (3) we did not have much money to do/buy stuff anyway. Those three things greatly limited the things we could do.

I did have other things to do which kept me busy but lacking those things I can do today (and with driving, not much longer after I turned 15) could make one feel bored as a teenager.

[Overachiever]

Letting go and letting things wash over you and not analyzing too much is all about 'living in the moment.' You actually miss less of life cause you aren't lost in thought trying to figure it out.

[Account Deleted]

HA ha a Jazz appreciation class.... That made my day :). I think many people could benefit from Death Metal appreciation classes because like jazz it's sometimes hard to pick out the melody..... but it is there :)

I love Jazz, with no training, probably because I just go along for the ride. Movies though.... I am always thinking and tryng to guess the plot before it's unfolded.

Thanks,
Forest.
http://frugalzeitgeist.com

[SylviaB]

It's all about attitude isn't it? I still try to figure it all out - I'm sort of driven that way - but whether I can or not isn't so important any more. Most important is stopping to realize how wonderful it is to be able to go sit in the backyard and read all afternoon because that's what I want to do. Thanks for this reminder Syd.